Let Power Posing Supercharge Your Speaking Confidence

When I was a kid, I never missed an episode of "Superman". Faster than a speeding bullet; able to leap tall buildings at a single bound; the man of steel fought for truth, justice, and the American way. 

As I watched each show, I would assume that signature Superman stance and feel as though I too, was a man of steel.

But alas, as time passes we "grow up". We learn that there really is no Santa Claus, Easter Bunny, or Superman. As I "grew up", the idea that I could take on super powers faded from memory.

My Rediscovery of Superman

One day in 2013, I discovered an intriguing TED Talk entitled, "Your Body Language Shapes Who You Are". The presenter was a Harvard social psychologist named  Dr. Amy Cuddy.

As Dr. Cuddy's talk unfolded, she described her research about the effects posture and stance exert on the brain, mind, and body. She showed photos of birds, chimps, and other animals assuming postures of dominant power and submissive weakness.

She and her team of researchers wondered what the biochemical and emotional effects were on human beings when they assumed what she called Power Poses compared to when they assumed postures of submission and defeat.

What Dr. Cuddy Discovered

 

The results of her team's experiments showed that when you consciously change your posture, your emotions and physiology come along for the ride. As we assume postures of shrinking and defeat, our cortisol (a hormone associated with fear and the stress) level rises sharply and testosterone (a hormone associated with confidence and a felt sense of power) drops significantly.

When, however, we assume strong, expansive Power Poses, our cortisol level falls and the level of testosterone increases. We feel more powerful and confident. The positive biochemical and emotional effects of just two minutes of Power Posing can last for hours.

What is a Power Pose?

Examples of Power Poses include hands raised in victory as a runner crosses the finish line in first place, the dance and celebration when a football player catches a pass in the end zone, and the expansive open arms when an entertainer receives a massive ovation from the audience.

In these examples, the successful act preceded the Power Pose. It turns out, however, we can consciously choose to assume a Power Pose and experience the same physical and emotional changes as those who won the race, caught the pass, and received a standing ovation.

Power Posing and Public Speaking Confidence

A good percentage of my consulting work with clients involves helping them overcome the fear of public speaking. As I studied Dr. Cuddy's work, it became clear teaching Power Posing to clients was a way to help them achieve a mindset of communication confidence.

Having taught Power Posing to scores of clients over the past couple of years, I regularly hear from them about how effective Power Posing has been in helping them feel confident and powerful going into public speaking and meeting situations. It's effective and simple to do and works like magic.

How You Can Power Pose for Greater Confidence

• Find a private place where you won't be disturbed for two or three minutes. Begin by standing up tall, shoulders back and head up. Take three comfortable slow breathes in and out.

• Bring to mind a picture of Superman, Wonder Women, or another superhero of your choosing. Notice how your superhero stands and notice how confident he or she appears.

• Stand with feet slightly more than shoulder-width apart. Place your hands on your hips. Think how your mother stood as she was about to scold you when you were a child.

• Raise your head slightly and look up toward the sky and then bring your eyes back down looking straight out.

• Stand tall, open your chest, and breathe confidently from the diaphragm.

• Really get into the felt sense of the Power Pose. Feel the strength, energy, and confidence rise in your body.

• Hold the Power Pose for about two minutes and end it by opening and raising your arms in a winner's pose saying emphatically, "YES! YES! YES!..."

You're now set to enter your public speaking event, meeting, difficult conversation, or any other activity that calls for you to feel powerful and confident.

Blessings and light,

Steve Carter

=> P.S. Learn How to Combine Positive EFT and Power Posing.

I'll be conducting the 1-day Positive EFT class in Ellicott City, Maryland on Sunday, 30 April 2017. As a bonus for attending that event, you will learn how to incorporate Power Posing with Positive EFT to more easily earn more money, enhance emotional and physical well-being, and experience a happier life. 

=> See details now at http://www.eft-md.com/positive-eft.html.

  

One Easy Way to Create the Relaxation Response

There is a gently focused brain state that encourages the emergence of a calm mind and relaxed body. This beneficial state is called the Relaxation Response.

One way to easily enter this brain state is to sit comfortably, choose an object to observe, and begin to simply notice. The noticing is gentle, but purposive.

A Present Moment Experience

In front of me as these words are being written sits a piece of amethyst. My eyes are drawn to one facet and then another of the beautiful gem.

As the rays of sunlight fall on the stone, I notice a continuum of purple shades and then the unique shapes and angles of hundreds upon hundreds of facets.

As my eyes wander along the gem, they find their way to the stone’s base where it meets the tabletop. From some subconscious level an awareness arises suggesting the stone’s base is like a flower stem from which leaves and colorful, perfectly shaped blooms emerge.

There’s a sense of deep connection with the crystal as my eyes of imagination fixate on a spot deep within the stone that my physical eyes can’t see. From a subconscious place of knowing, I choose to rest awareness on that special spot.

My mind is silent. I’m aware of my breath; I’m aware of my body; I’m aware of my sense of calm connection to a reality beyond my five physical senses.

I choose to float in this special place of peace for what seems like an hour, but according to the clock is just a little more than a minute.

As I silently choose to return to normal consciousness, I notice my body is relaxed, my mind remains quiet, and I’m smiling a soft Mona Lisa smile of contentment.

Choosing Your Focus Object

While I happened to choose a lovely piece of amethyst as my focus object, you can use any object. Flowers, glass, paintings, photos, even a coffee cup are all options.

With this type of meditation, we can choose any physical object. Sounds can also be points of focus as can physical sensations such the breath.

Choosing Peace

There are countless meditation methods that can result in beneficial brain, mind, and body states of peace.  

Regardless of what meditation method you’re drawn to, only two choices are necessary. First, choose to experience the Relaxation Response for whatever time period you prefer and; secondly, choose a method to create that health and emotional well-being experience.

Which Meditation Method is Best?

One of the most frequent questions I hear from new clients is, “Which meditation method is best?”.

Because I get this question so frequently, I decided to offer a free webinar that will answer that question for everyone who attends.

I’ll be announcing the date, time, and other webinar details in a few days. If you would like to attend or receive the replay, go to http://www.eft-md.com/contact-us.html, and enter your email address in the email field under the words, “Join Our Energy and Holistic Healing Family”.

Entering your name is optional, but obviously your email address is needed to send you the upcoming, “Which Meditation Method is Best?” webinar details.

With love light, and blessings,

Steve Carter

Stress Solutions, LLC

www.EFT-MD.com

P.S. In addition to the information you’ll receive during the webinar, you’ll also receive a PDF copy of the slides. There’s zero obligation to buy anything because nothing is for sale.

==> To get on the notification list, please click HERE and simply enter your email address.

It’s that simple…

P.P.S. Never miss a Stress Mastery blog post! Place your email address in the "Follow by Email" box on the right to have each post delivered to your In-box.

Harness The Positive Power of Your "But"

Self-talk matters. Of the stream of words we say out loud and within mind day in and day out, one of the most powerful is the word “but”. Unfortunately, our use of “but” is typically negative.

Consider these all too common examples of self-talk:

“I try so hard, but everything always turns out bad!”

“I really want better relations with my partner, but I never can say anything without being criticized!”

“I deserve a raise, but I know if I ask for more money my boss will say, 'No' and then probably fire me!”

The Role of "But" in Affirmations

What’s the problem with such self-talk examples? Every one of these statements and hundreds of other similar comments we say to ourselves in mind and out loud are affirmations.

Affirmations? Yes. Everything that follows the word “but” is the real affirmation your subconscious hears and believes. Our internal self-image is in large measure shaped by self-talk affirmations.

The Secret to Making Your “But” Work for You

Can “but” be used to create positive self-talk affirmations while still voicing what seems to be a truthful assessment of a situation? Yes, absolutely.

The secret to making your “but” work for you is to change the way it’s typically used in a declarative sentence and then add a Choices Statement immediately following the declarative sentence.

Let’s take another look at the three self-talk sentences, but this time let’s engage your “but” in a positive way:

“I’ve made mistakes, but with each mistake, I learned something important. I choose to put that new knowledge to work and up my game!”

“My partner and I aren’t talking in a loving way, but I know we love each other and we can do better. I choose to talk lovingly and ask how I can be a better communicator and partner every day!”

“I haven’t had a raise in three years, but I know I deserve one. I choose to put in writing a short, but clearly stated summary of why and sit down with my boss to talk about how much more I’m adding to the success of our company. If he says, “No”, that summary will be useful as a foundation for a resume.”

3 Simple Steps to a Better “But”

To help you use your “but” more effectively, I suggest doing the following:

• Pay attention to your self-talk whenever “but” shows up. 
• If it’s a negative “but”, say, “Cancel Cancel”.
• Restate the self-talk statement with positives following the “but” and then add a Choices Statement. That Choices Statement is your call to action to change the original unwanted reality you perceived.

Next Steps

Put your positive “but” in action from today forward. You’ll think better, feel better, and perform better in every area of life.

Use a journal or otherwise record your successes. Any new habit takes time and repetition.

Writing down your successful use of this little word “but” tells your subconscious you’re serious about creating a happier more successful you.

With light and love,

Steve Carter

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The Truth About Mental Health and Why It Matters

The article, "On Balance 2016 was a Pretty Garbage Year for Mental Health", by Lindsay Holmes of the "Huffington Post" linked below pretty well sums up the past year in relation to the status of mental health in our culture and it's portrayal in the media.

There is an incredible amount of ignorance about mental health. We saw this ignorance on display as part of the recent election and other political and social theater this past year.

Be Smart and Get Help

If you or someone you care about needs help, I encourage you to get it. There is no shame in going to the doctor to get treated for pneumonia. Seeking help for an emotional or mental issue is no different. It's smart to get help.

It's also smart for us all to recognize that using pejorative labels such as "crazy", "nut-case", and similar terms is factually inaccurate and mentality debilitating for the person throwing those terms about. 

Give Yourself the Gift of Self-Care

One other smart thing to do: give yourself the gift of emotional self-care for stress. Stress - acute and chronic - makes any emotional, mental, or physical issue feel more intense. Indeed, for many people, problem thoughts, feelings, and emotional acting out occur only during periods of high stress.

Be smart. Read posts on this site and apply a few of the Stress-Mastery methods shared in those posts; attend a yoga or Tai Chi class; take a daily walk to reconnect with Mother Nature; use tapping methods such as EFT (see http://www.EFT-MD.com) to help regain mental and emotional balance; find a meditation teacher or research and use one of the easily done DIY meditation methods.

Be smart. It makes sense to de-stress.

Love and blessings,

Steve Carter

Stress Solutions, LLC

www.EFT-MD.com

P.S. To ensure you never miss a post, join our Stress Mastery community by simply entering your email address in the "Follow by Email" box on the right. No spam; no sharing.

Linked "Huffington Post" article: Lindsay Holmes, "On Balance, 2016 Was A Pretty Garbage Year For Mental Health" http://tinyurl.com/hbphufk

A Simple Way to a Calm Mind

There are countless ways to calm the mind. One challenge with many methods relates to the need to remove yourself mentally and physically from your day-to-day activities and sit quietly as you focus on a sound, an object, or your thoughts. 

What if there is an alternative to sitting for extended periods of time? Can you easily incorporate a simple mindful meditation practice into daily activities that take just one or two minutes and still provide hours of benefits? The good news is you can do that easily.

The Simple Steps

Begin by choosing an activity you normally do with little conscious attention. Activities such as brushing your teeth, shaving, walking, or eating all are perfect candidates. 

Before beginning your activity, stop for a moment and take two comfortable breaths. Feel the air enter the nostrils and attend to any physical sensations in your body. Notice if you're breathing into your upper chest, the middle chest, or deep from the diaphragm.  Change nothing; simply notice.

Turn your attention toward the activity. If, for example, you're brushing your teeth, slow down and pick up the toothbrush. Feel the sensations in your hand as you pick it up. Look at the toothbrush; really look at it and notice any writing, the color, the bristles, and it's overall shape. Just notice the individual parts of the toothbrush and then open your focus and notice the whole toothbrush as you're holding it.

Turn your awareness to the tube of toothpaste. Look at the tube with fresh eyes. Notice any writing, colors, the size, and how it feels in your hand. Notice it's weight and shape. Slowly unscrew the cap and squeeze toothpaste onto the toothbrush. Do this slowly and watch without judgment. 

As you slowly bring the toothbrush to your mouth, notice the physical sensations as you open your mouth. Where do you begin brushing? Notice without judgment. 

Give your attention to the physical sensations of brushing. Notice any sensations in your face, neck, chest, back, hands, arms, and shoulders. Simply notice.

When you are done, watch the water rinse off the toothbrush, replace the toothbrush to it's normal resting place, and replace the cap onto the toothpaste.

Stand up straight, take two more comfortable breaths, and scan your body. Notice your sense of calmness, presence, and peace. Take a final comfortable breath and go about your day.

Two Minutes of Mindful Attention Can Bring Hours of Benefits

The one to two minutes you dedicated to mindfully attending to brushing your teeth will result in biochemical, mental, and emotional benefits that can last for hours. 

You can throughout your day repeat this same mind-calming process with other activities that are normally on autopilot.

Congratulations! You are now a mindfulness meditation practitioner. 

With love and blessings,

Steve Carter

Stress Solutions, LLC

www.EFT-MD.com

P.S. To ensure you never miss a post, join our Stress Mastery community by simply entering your email address in the "Follow by Email" box on the right. No spam; no sharing.

How to Change the World for Good - One Question at a Time

We are always asking questions. Sometimes the questions are conscious, but usually they aren’t.

The key question that is always in play with the subconscious mind is, “What does this mean for me?”. 

A second related question always in play when considering two or more options is, “What’s in it for me?”. 

When it comes to choosing among options, your brain is always tuned to WII-FM.

The Problem With These Two Questions

These two questions are primary drivers of emotions and frequently of behavior. The problem is we’re seldom aware that these two questions are the sole directors of our conscious thoughts, our emotions, and frequently our behavior.

Positive Questions Create Positive Outcomes

I suggest trying this experiment: set an alarm on your smartphone, schedule a short break on your calendar, or otherwise create notifications every two hours or so throughout your day. Each time the alarm is activated, use it as a reminder to ask yourself a positive question designed to change your mood, your thoughts, and your actions.

Examples of positive questions are:

• "What am I grateful for in this moment?"

• "Is there someone around me who needs cheering up? What honest complement or words of encouragement can I share with that person?"

• "Have I told someone I care about today how much I appreciate them? I’ll call them now to tell them."

• "Am I doing my best work on this project? How can I add value to this project, an upcoming meeting, or otherwise improve the experience and outcome for everyone?"

• "Have I smiled enough today?"

• "Have I taken one or two minutes to stretch, breathe deeply, take a short walk, or otherwise do something physical to lower my stress?"

• "Have I acknowledged at least one thing I’ve done well today and told myself, ‘Well done!’?"

You Can Change the World One Question at a Time

Consciously choosing to ask positive questions changes your thoughts, your feelings, and frequently your behaviors. Equally important, positive questions create a field of positive energy for everyone around you. 

Each positive question you ask results in our world being a happier and more productive place.

Why not have a go at being a world changer today?

Blessings,

Steve

P.S. In January, you can join us for the no cost, "Question Your Way to Abundance" webinar. 

Visit http://www.eft-md.com/education-resource.html, sign up for the Stress Mastery newsletter, and you'll be notified later in December about the free January event.

6 Easy Ways to Energize Your Day!

Here are 6 easy ways to cleanse and clear your old energy sludge and open your system valves to a torrent of feel wonderful fresh energy flow.

Yawn, Sigh, and Stretch

Sit up or stand up straight, stretch your arms out or up, breathe in deeply, and yawn. Yawn even if you don’t feel as though you need to yawn. Allow yourself to yawn two or three more times. Each yawn will feel better than the one before!

When you yawn, sigh, and stretch loads of good things happen in your body. You relax your jaw and throat, you signal the body that you’re safe and calm, and you clear out sludge from the prefrontal cortex (the area of your brain primarily responsible for conscious thinking) and prepare it to return to work in a relaxed, invigorated state.

Close Your Eyes and Breathe Deeply for at Least One Minute

When you close your eyes, your brainwave patterns automatically shift toward producing more alpha waves, the brain waves that create a sense of calm and relaxation. Add in slower, deeper breathing, and you have a recipe for renewable energy that tastes great and feels wonderful.

Stand Up and Take a Walk

Your prefrontal cortex tends to tire after about 30-minutes or so of focused attention. Creativity decreases and a you can feel tired and spent. Think of the last time you spent an hour or more working feverishly on your computer with no break.

Standing up and walking around for a minute or two every 30-minutes or so will help ensure you stay fresh and relaxed throughout your day. If you have been standing for extended periods, sit down and allow yourself to simply “Be” as you relax body / mind / and spirit.

Tidy Up Your Space

The Chinese practice of Feng Shui offers many benefits for those who choose to use it. It’s an effective way to create a harmonies, nourishing living or work space.

Don’t want to study Feng Shui? No problem. It’s easy to apply Feng Shui’s most important principle: Open space.

When you clear off desk and table surfaces, remove unnecessary items in your space (to include your computer desktop), and generally tidy up, you’re opening your space to encourage flowing energy.

It feels good to tidy up.

Call a Loved One or an Old Friend Just to Say “Hi”

I’ll bet there is a loved one or an old friend you’ve been meaning to call for months. Call that person now or schedule a call on your calendar for sometime today or tomorrow. There is a loving positive energy that starts to flow as soon as we hear the familiar voice of someone special. Imagine how surprised that special someone will be when they hear your voice and how good you’ll feel for making that call.

Fire Up a YouTube Music Video That Makes You Want to Dance

There are thousands upon thousands of music videos on YouTube. Some of my favorite artists are the Temptations, Chuck Berry, and the Rolling Stones. Your favorites are likely different. Regardless of who your favorite artists may be, I’ll bet you dance in your chair - or maybe even standing up - as soon as the music starts.

Music is a great way to energize yourself and create a special “super feel good” experience. Take a music break two or three times a day and notice how much better you feel and how much more you get done.

There you have it! Six great ways to energize your day:

• Yawn, Sigh, and Stretch;
• Close Your Eyes and Breathe Deeply;
• Stand Up and Take a Walk;
• Tidy Up Your Space;
• Call a Loved One or an Old Friend Just to Say "Hi"; and,
• Fire Up a YouTube Video That Makes You Want to Dance.

What other ways have you discovered to energize your day and feel great? Share your high energy "secret sauce" in the comments section below.

Blessings and light,

Steve Carter

Stress Solutions, LLC | www.EFT-MD.com

P.S. Never miss a Stress Mastery blog post! Place your email address in the "Follow by Email" box on the right to have each post delivered to your In-box.