How to Change a Painful Memory With a Simple NLP Technique

Can you change the way a painful incident is remembered?

You may be surprised to learn our memories are not fixed. 

As a matter of fact, many of our memories are far from accurate. As an example, ask a sibling or friend to recall an incident where you both were present. Chances are your sibling or friend's "story" has significant differences from the one you remember. You may even wonder if you're talking about the same incident.

This can be a big problem in our criminal justice system. Ask five eye witnesses to a crime what happened and you'll get seven different versions of the event.

Our Memories Aren't Fixed

To make matters worse, our own memory of a given event can change over time. Memories aren't photographs or video files. We may recall only a scant few bits and pieces of a past event. The brain fills in the rest to flesh out the memory.

There is a good news piece to this story. You can usually consciously change how you recall a given experience. If the experience was painful, you can adjust how the experience is rendered in mind in such a way as to lesson and often dissolve the emotional reaction.

NLP to the Rescue 

One tool for helping change how we represent and experience memories is a method called Neuro-Linguistic Programming, or NLP. 

In the episode (click player) linked below of the, "Mind Over Stress" podcast, I take you through step by step a short NLP process to literally change how your brain represents a problem memory.

Important Disclaimer!

One important caveat: This technique is offered for informational purposes only. It is not intended to treat or prevent any medical or psychological condition. If you choose to try this technique, you agree to take full, complete, and sole responsibility for your own psychological, emotional, and physical wellbeing. Always consult your medical doctor or appropriate licensed therapist for all issues of concern.

Assuming you're keen to learn and apply the NLP technique, click the player below and follow the simple steps shared in the audio podcast.

Stephen Carter | CEO, Stress Solutions, LLC | https://www.EFT-MD.com | "Mind Over Stress" Podcast website: www.MindOverStress.us

Direct link to player if you don't see one immediately below. 
https://radiopublic.com/mind-over-stress-WDJEJ7/ep/s1!759a5

Break the Chains of Impulsive Behavior

Whether we’re thinking about having a second helping of dessert, buying a new expensive iPhone 7 when the existing phone works just fine, or choosing between an expensive destination wedding and a more modest ceremony close to home, too often we choose short-term immediate gratification at the expense of longer term bigger benefits.

Is there something we can do to help us break the chains of short-term impulsive thinking and behavior?

Yes, there is.

The Brain Science

Traditionally, self-control models look at brain processes in the prefrontal cortex associated with impulse control and emotions when attempting to explain why we so often make decisions favoring immediate short-term gain rather than opting for greater longer term benefits.

In a recent *study conducted by the University of Zurich and the University of Dusseldorf, researchers discovered another brain region called the temporo-parietal junction plays an important role in self-control by directing attention to the needs of a “Future Self”.

This discovery helps explain why a process I often use with clients called “Future Pacing” can be so effective in helping stop problem thinking and behaviors such as, low confidence, compulsive overeating, or other disempowering patterns.

Creating a “New You” With Future Pacing

Here’s how to put Future Pacing to work in your life:

• Find a quiet, private, and comfortable place where you won’t be bothered for at least five minutes. Close your eyes and - as best you can - enter a calm and relaxed state.

• Bring to mind a visualization of how you want to handle a situation that, in the past, you handled poorly.

• Create a mind-movie of you handling that same situation in a way that aligns with your chosen new reality. Play that movie on the big screen in your Theatre of Mind. Allow the pictures to be big, bright, and bold. Give your mind-movie a title in alignment with your chosen new reality such as, “Confident Speaker”, “Healthy Eater”, or “Loving Partner”.

• Add sound as appropriate. Hear others complimenting you on your chosen behavior. Hear yourself affirm how good you feel as you act in alignment with your new chosen reality.

• Allow yourself to see, hear, and feel this chosen new, ongoing reality from a third person point of view (you’re watching yourself as if you are in a movie audience), a second person point of view (you’re in the movie, but looking at yourself through the eyes of another character in the movie), and a first person point of view (you’re looking through your own eyes). Really make the visualizations, big, bold, and empowering.

• Allow your “Success Mind-Movie” to play for several minutes and then return to your normal activities.

Repeat this Future Pacing process three or four times a day for at least three weeks and then periodically ongoing until this new behavior becomes your default habitual way of behaving.

When faced with a situation that in the past may have resulted in short-term impulsive behavior, a quick visit in mind to a short section of your Future Pacing mind-movie will be all you need to direct attention and behavior to your new reality. You are "Re-minding" a chosen, empowering way of being.

Remember, you’re creating a script and then rehearsing the staring role as a happier, healthier new you. In just a few short weeks - or even in a few short days - your mind-movie can become your new way of living.

If you would like to learn more about our Future Pacing process and other ways of moving from Stress to Success, visit us at http://www.EFT-MD.com.

Blessings, light, and love,

Steve Carter

Stress Solutions, LLC | www.EFT-MD.com

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Important note: This post and all other posts on this blog are for informational purposes only. Please consult an appropriate licensed health care provider for any medical, emotional, or psychological issues of concern.

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*Journal Reference:

A. Soutschek, C. C. Ruff, T. Strombach, T. Kalenscher, P. N. Tobler.Brain stimulation reveals crucial role of overcoming self-centeredness in self-control. Science Advances, 2016; 2 (10): e1600992 DOI: 10.1126/sciadv.1600992